Write Ways to Wellbeing

The Birth Story of Life Writing Alchemy

My miracle house (see Magic Snuck Up On Me) had an empty built-in robe space. My bookshelf fit perfectly! Much nicer than a robe, I think. 💛

This is the story of how writing breathed life back into me, in the aftermath of The Day My Life Tipped Upside Down. In those early days, many things were wrestling (and dancing) inside of me. Looking back, it’s hard to pinpoint one thing that thawed my frozen heart. I described my journey in Magic Snuck Up On Me. What I didn’t talk about there, was the pivotal role that writing played in my healing journey.

At first I could write nothing. My brain and hands were as frozen in grief as the rest of me, unable to pull words together in any form. But over time, words came. At first it was fragments, shards of pain mostly. Then more flowed. I wrote to remember. I wrote to distract myself and to escape. I wrote to heal and release. I wrote to reprogram my mind and reframe my past. I wrote to relish the moments, capture the wow and record gratitude. I wrote to vision and rebuild my future. I wrote to connect and to rediscover life and love.

I was transformed by words in so many ways, and this now fuels my passion to grow Life Writing Alchemy as a love offering for others. I feel like I’ve been in labour with this baby for an infinity, but now Life Writing Alchemy is here. And I want to celebrate her, to share her story.

Life Writing Alchemy is multi-dimensional. She is possibility. She is hope. With deep curiosity, she says YES to life. She loves nature and travel and literature and science. She is a spiritual explorer and a wonder-smitten, playful child. She wants to shout from the treetops about how writing can heal and transform and enliven us. She has many tricks up her sleeve, for how writing might surprise and change us. And she will share stories from my life, because it was my experiences that conceived her.

My vision for Life Writing Alchemy is that she become an inspiring library of writing wisdom, playful tools, writing sparks and adventures - all designed to help readers transmute trauma and heartache, discover their soul gold, live fully and distill life into an elixir of creative expression. Oh, and I envision deep conversation in The Comments Cafe, as we encourage one another along our writing paths.

My story continues

I had tried, off and on for years, to build a habit of morning pages (as taught by Julia Cameron in The Artist’s Way). So, when I stumbled upon yet another YouTube video extolling the wonder of morning pages, I felt convicted to try again. Convicted, but not committed. The chipmunk had other ideas. (I promised he’d make another appearance.) The next morning at 3am sharp, that chipmunk, who’d been silent for over a month, awoke me with loud chirping. I staggered out of bed to switch him off, and I knew (intuitively) that I’d been woken to write. So I wrote. I wrote whatever came; outpourings of emotion, details of our lives, the things that were breaking down around us, the court cases and money struggles, all of it. I wrote and wrote until (god knows how) that chipmunk started himself up again, and this time I knew he was saying, “That’s enough. Go back to sleep now.” So I did.

I’d be lying if I said this started a habit of morning pages. It did not. But, it did jumpstart some word flow. It was the first of several cathartic sessions on the page. Tangled emotion and all manner of icky gunk spewed forth into the light of day, where it could be seen, processed, released.

At first I screamed on the page, but eventually I was able to speak more tenderly to my hurting parts. To love them up, to love my whole self up.

I wrote across the timeline of my life as if it was a movie, rewinding, pausing to look closer, fast forwarding, pausing. On and on, layer after layer of healing. When I found myself writing in circles, I knew something needed to be released. Patterns showed up on the page, ruts that needed to be rerouted.

Although this journey was triggered by the day my life tipped upside down, the ickiness inside of me was pervasive. Once I’d fallen down the rabbit hole of healing, there was no stopping. Threads unravelled across my whole life, back through childhood, into the womb even. Without my awareness, all sorts of stuff had been shutting me down to life. It was time to say, ‘No More!!’ And I did, on the page, and then in real life.

Now, I need to double back to the beginning. There were only short windows of time when I could face this cathartic writing. It felt overwhelming to look my problems in the eye, or face them on the page. That’s when another kind of writing came to my rescue.

I Wrote to Distract Myself & to Fulfil Myself Creatively

I had been enrolled in a Master of Creative Writing program, but withdrew when our lives imploded. I convinced myself that I couldn’t possibly focus on that now. When my children returned to school, I hid from my pain by watching soppy movies, or distracting myself with the endless scroll. Some of this was on the healing trail, but mostly it was just a time drain. I need a healthier distraction. So I rejoined the masters program, and escaped into fictional worlds of my own dreaming; wondrous worlds of magical realism.

The Masters ended up being more than a distraction though. Firstly, I noticed that my subconscious was sneaking things into my narratives, things that I later recognised as spiritually significant. Gifts started calling out to my characters. An infinite library appeared (before I had ever heard of the akashic records). My soul (higher self?) clearly knew things before I did, and was dropping hints into my fictional worlds.

Secondly, having this creative outlet kindled a sense of purpose and even joy in my heart. I was experiencing the truth of a favourite quote from one of the lost gospels of Jesus:

If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you. Gospel of Thomas, verse 70

For anyone who has felt a call to write (or create in any way), following that call is essential on the path to wholeness. Creative expression was as important to my healing, as directly facing my inner turmoil. This also became powerful role-modeling for my children, who eventually followed their own creative paths: music, art, outdoor education, and architecture.

Lose the Cynicism

I’ve learned to never underestimate the potential of a writing invitation or prompt. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read about an activity and cynically proclaimed it lame, or ridiculous, only to be totally transformed by it. Affirmations and mantras. Gratitude journaling. The Painted Picture.

I first heard about the painted picture from a fancy-spoken woman (sorry, I couldn’t find her name) on an audio recording. ‘Use words to paint a picture of your dream future,’ she said. ‘Write it in present tense, as if you are living it now.’ She promised that this could make that future come true. ‘Yeah, right. As if…’ I mocked. But later that day, I idly wondered, ‘what would my ideal future look like, if I was to write it?’ Without any belief in a ‘magical’ outcome, I jotted down ideas. Each day I was drawn back to tweak and expand on what I’d written, until I had a full-blown ‘painted picture’. Beyond all other writing activities this has been my most clarifying. Whether or not you believe words have the power to ‘attract’ your ideal future, this exercise helps you gain clarity, and clarity helps with decision making every step of the way.

Many parts of my painted picture have now come true, whether by the ‘magic’ of the law of attraction, or by the logic of clarifying, perhaps doesn’t matter. This exercise was a powerful pivot point for me. After I moved into my miracle house in 2020, I revisited my painted picture, and was surprised to realise my home and location were exactly as described. Down to the detail. In fact, some details didn’t reveal themselves until after I’d moved in. On one daily walk, I found an unexpected nature trail that had me wow, wow, wowing all the way home. Another day, I stumbled upon a cool cafe, with a deliciously healthy menu. It definitely felt like magic.

My understanding of these things is more nuanced now. Beyond our words, our energy and emotion matter too. Alignment with our essence, our soul, also matters. But the painted picture remains a powerful exercise. You’re probably familiar with vision boards. The painted picture is a variation, perfect for writerly types. I invite you to give it a go.

Finally, I Write to Connect

It took years for me to feel ready to convert my cathartic ramblings into pieces that would communicate to an audience. The vulnerability involved in telling my stories was a red light to my sharing, a red light that would not turn green. I fumed impatiently at that traffic light, convinced I had writer’s block. In retrospect, I see that my self-love and acceptance needed to be bolstered enough for me to share without collapsing under the weight of my own pain. Healing is a process. Timing matters.

Now, finally, I write to connect. Here at Life Writing Alchemy I share stories and musings as invitations for you to write your own. I invite you to wield words in the myriad of magical ways that words can be used to write and rewrite life. Write to reframe your PAST. Write to relish your NOW. Write to rock your FUTURE.

Writing eventually guided me through, helped me to connect to the voice within that knows the way, enabling me to make much needed decisions, and chart a course forward. Writing (and divine love) thawed me out, and reignited my life.

I wonder, how has writing helped you? Please share in the comments.

                                   Much Love,

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